30 Survival Tips to Keep You On This Earth
Nathan Johnson
Published
10/22/2021
in
ftw
Survival tips like these are kind of like insurance; hope you never need them but be glad you have them. Because, when the moment comes, you never know what seemingly useless fact you read on that one website you loved as a kid might be the difference-maker that keeps you alive to see your grandkids.
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1.
If your car's accelerator pedal gets stuck or something else is causing unintended acceleration. Put it in neutral. It sounds obvious but it's hard to remember when it happens and it won't be instinct. Turning the key off works but could cause the steering to lock or loss of breaks. -
2.
If someone points a gun at you, maintain eye contact with the person. Eye contact makes it harder to pull the trigger. -
3.
If you get lost in the woods, stay where you are! The chances of finding the way out on your own are pretty slim and you’re just creating a larger search area for SAR. Also, tell people exactly where you’re going and when you’ll be home. If you’re not home by X time, instruct someone to call for help. -
4.
That a wagging tail does NOT always mean that the dog is friendly. -
5.
SLEEP WITH THE DOOR CLOSED. Fires, while you sleep, can leave your room almost completely untouched if closed. -
6.
In the event you need to break a car door window don't try to smash the window dead center. Car door windows should be tempered glass which is much more brittle along their edges so strike there instead. -
7.
"flammable" and "inflammable" mean the same thing!!!! Flammable things burn very easily, like a candle wick. Inflammable things need not be easy to ignite, like magnesium, but once ignited, will burn rapidly. -
8.
If you're near the ocean and all that water suddenly dissappears/recedes unexpectedly then get out of there and get to high ground because that's a tsunami. -
9.
Former 911 operator here. DON'T FEEL BAD ABOUT CALLING 911! Unless it's very stupid like McDonald's screwed up your order. If it's not an emergency, they'll tell you to call non-emerg. An emergency is not just a violent crime, it's a crime or potential crime in progress, an issue affecting safety (or medical emergency or fire department issue too) Also, teach your non-English speaking family the word for their language in English in case they need to call 911. -
10.
You can give yourself the Heimlich Maneuver. -
11.
Some winter advice. If you are homeless, or for whatever reason have to sleep outside, find something to put between you and the ground. Cardboard works great but find something. All your energy will not warm the Earth and many people have frozen this way as the ground absorbs more and more energy. -
12.
If you are trying to decide whether to drink the unsafe "nature" water or risk dehydration: giardia takes 5 days to set in, renal failure can take less than 5 hours, so if it comes down to it and you can get to safety soon(a few days), risk the water. A week of spewing from both ends from the safety of your own home is better than dying of dehydration. Also, chugging water can make you sick. You also need to replace the electrolytes. Do anything you can to provide electrolytes if you chug half a gallon or more. -
13.
If you see a bear cub, a very angry mother isn't to far behind. -
14.
911 is not the emergency number in most countries. Find out what the emergency number is in whichever country you’re planning to visit. -
15.
If a guard dog comes at you, look to one side and slowly turn around. Then walk away. If a dog hunts you, scream before it reaches you and fight if it didn't scare. The first has saved me from two rottweilers once. -
16.
If you or someone else is having a heart attack, take aspirin. Chew it tho, don’t swallow it whole. Also, when performing CPR, people don’t usually come back to life like in the movies. If done correctly, CPR can keep people alive for hours, so keep going until help arrives -
17.
Chemical burns are not like fire or heat burns. Many will not immediately trigger a reflex action of pain. I lost a chunk of skin under my armpit because an industrial cleaner dripped under my rain suit. I had rinsed off my arm and didn't receive so much redness, but 30 minutes later I noticed my shirt was soaked in blood. No pain till the next day and by then a quarter size piece of skin had fallen off. Read the labels and remove any chemical as quickly as possible using the recommended method. Water is not always the best way. -
18.
If you’re scuba diving and you’re going to vomit, puke right into the regulator. Don’t take the regulator out of your mouth because after you vomit the natural instinct is to inhale. The puke will blow out of the exhaust valve with your bubbles. We did a discovery dive and were not taught about this. Thankfully we were only a few feet down. It could’ve been one of those life changing days... -
19.
Purple flags at the beach mean dangerous sea life in the area. Most people understand the other flags, but purple can be confusing. -
20.
If you get trapped on thin ice, lie down on your stomach and crawl/wiggle your way back to shore from the direction you got therefrom. Chances are if the ìce held you then when you were standing up, it will continue to hold you with your weight dispersed over more surface area. -
21.
Don't be silent for extended periods of time if you are hiking in the wilderness. Contrary to popular belief, bears would prefer to not get into confrontations and would most likely avoid you if you notify them of your presence in the area. With that said, if you do stumble across a bear, don't run away. Contrary to their size, bears are f**king fast. Grizzly bears are brown and have a trademark hump of muscle on their back. They are aggressive. Your best bet is to get into the fetal position (covering neck and stomach) and play dead. They will only leave once they are absolutely sure the threat is gone, so don't stop playing dead even after you sense the bear leave. Black bears, contrary to their name, come in various colors, including Brown. They are more slender than grizzly bears. Your best bet with a black bear is to be as aggressive as possible, making as much noise, looking as big as possible, throwing stones and large sticks, etc. Don't bother to climb a tree, since they are excellent climbers. In the event a bear starts attacking, go HAM. Punch it, kick it, try to gouge out its eyes, etc. If you happened to be in the Arctic and stumble upon a polar bear, then pray to the Almighty that it hits one of your vital points and kills you quickly, because there is practically nothing you can do against them. They are much bigger than both black and grizzly bears, and do not fear humans. -
22.
Most drunk driving deaths occur on Saturday night between 1 and 3 am. Avoid the roads during these times if you can help it. -
23.
If you ever fall off a ship/ferry at sea and were lucky enough to be spotted - don't try to swim your way to safety. The more you try to swim, the lesser the chances of survival. Just try to keep afloat and conserve energy while rescue team do what they're supposed to. Unless you are in hypothermic waters, the best bet always is to stay afloat without trying to swim to somewhere. -
24.
If you wake up in the middle of the night (or come back home) to the smell of gas filling the house, never turn on the lights. Any spark from the light switch could blow up the entire house. -
25.
If there's heavy bleeding or a partial/full amputation throw a f**king tourniquet on that limb as close to the torso as you can. Write the time on their forehead and DO NOT EVER LOOSEN IT. Everything you've been taught about tourniquets is wrong. They can be on for 6 hours with no worry of nerve damage, the limb will not need to be amputated, I say again, THE PLACEMENT OF A CAT-T WILL NOT DECIDE AMPUTATION. Crank that s**t harder than you think necessary and then let the doctor deal with it. 1: Major arteries are closer to the skin near the torso, giving you a better chance of clamping them. 2: It will stop any secondary wounds you potentially missed. 3: My training was for combat trauma / triage first, I then got civilian training later. I was never a practicing civilian EMT. If a paramedic has better info please PM me any inconsistencies and Ill correct them. 4: It looks like there's many different standards for potential nerve damage time limits, the lowest I've seen is 3 from someone claiming to work in Orthopedic surgery. Either way, having a derpy limb is better than no limb. -
26.
If you're on an airplane that crashes into water, don't inflate your life-vest until after you have swum out of the plane. If you inflate your flotation device before escaping you are much more likely to get trapped in the fuselage as water levels inside the plane rise and you get pushed towards the ceiling. Find your life jacket, get out of the plane, then inflate it. -
27.
If you are underwater too deep and don't know which way is up, follow the bubbles. -
28.
Seatbelt, windows, out. Seatbelt, windows, out. Seatbelt, windows, out. Drill this phrase in your head when there's a risk your vehicle could end up in the water. Undo your seatbelt, open your window, and get out. (Electric windows should still work for a little while.) Your car can sink fast and you may mentally lock up with indecision. So it helps to have a simple mantra to remember. There's an extra step if you have kids in the car with you, but I skipped over that part. If you have kids it's SEATBELT, CHILDREN, WINDOWS, OUT. Undo your own seatbelt, undo those of any children in the vehicle, open the driver-side window and escape, first pushing children out ahead of you. -
29.
If your vomit looks like coffee grounds or poop looks like tar, go to the doctor immediately. If your vomit/poop looks like these things, it means you're bleeding internally. Coffee grounds are a result of bleeding in your stomach, tar is a result of bleeding in your intestines. There are foods that will make you poop like this (red wine and Oreos e.g.), but you should know this just to be safe. -
30.
If your car is skidding on an icy or wet road, steer in the direction of the skid rather than against it. You have a better chance of regaining control of the car and you avoid the risk of flipping your car over. Most importantly do not slam the brakes. -
31.
Whether you’re being attacked or taken, always remember to scratch the bejeezus out of the person. This way you’ll have their DNA under your nails.
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